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Standing strong while others run a hundred miles....
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11.29.04 (4:39 pm)   [edit]
After work today, I went by the store. Picked up a new mop (which is just as cheap as replacing the sponge on the old one) and some paper towels.

*note to all non-parent Tbloggers - The preceeding paragraph may not have ment much to you, but every parent on this board immediatly connected the title of this post with that first paragragh and went "Oh shit..." for they know whats coming eventually*

Then I went to go get the tot. He had a good day, and I had a good day. We came home and bonded, he did some GTA, I read a book and worked on the computer... all was well.

Then he went tinkle in the toilet. Again, a good thing. And as usual lately, he asked for a bath afterwards. So I fill the tub, bubble it up, and wash him a bit, then head into the computer to work.

Now, the computer is straight across from the bathroom, so I can keep an eye on him. Plus, I popped in from time to time. He likes to clean himself, and has only crapped in the bathtub once in his life. So its fairly safe. Its a system that keeps him happy and clean, and lets me work.

Well, at one point he comes strolling out, butt nekkid and dripping wet. He does this from time to time, so its not a worry. He goes strolling into the kitchen, roots around in a drawer (the safe one, the only one he can open), and goes strolling back into the bathroom with a two inch paint brush. Again, this is nothing toooooo unusual.

But moments later, Daddy Sence™ starts tingling. So I glance into the bathroom. My kid is using to brush to spread a brown substance around the bathroom floor.

...

It takes the ol' gnomes mind a moment to process this. The conclusion is clear... now what must be done is assess the damage. So I calmly go into the bathroom and assertain the situation. Here is what happened:

The tot was playing in the tub, and he "launched a brown boat" if you catch my drift. It is not too unexpected, he is still potty training. I have told him to get out of the tub and get me to poop. Sooooo he decided to get out of the tub. On his way out, he drops a few more bombs on the floor. Now he knew he did something he shouldn't... so he decided to do the only logical thing a tot can do in that situation... clean up the mess. So he goes to get a brush to clean with... and it turns into a fun art project instead. In a toddlers mind, all is fine.

Well, all is NOT fine. I pick him up and look at his feet... covered in poo. So to save the carpet, I put him in the tub, not knowing there is a little brown U.S.S Enterprise in there. I check the living room carpet... all clear. I go get the new mop, some Pine Sol, some Orange Clean, and the paper towels. Then I return to my tot standing in a tub with a boat floating in it, watching it bob in the bubbles. By this time, the poop on his feet had rinced off, and it looked like I was bathing him in chocolate milk. I needed to do something, and fast.

So I told him to stand tight, and I cleaned up the floor (luckily, it was wet poo, so it was easy to mop up), grab the "paint" brush from his hand and set it in the sink to rinse... and clean the floor quickly. Then I check his feet, see that they are clean now, and set him in the floor while I drain the tub.

Of course... I fight a five minute battle getting the tub to drain with all the little "lifeboats" clogging up the drain, but eventually I succeed. I rinse, Orange Clean, and rince again the tub and all his bath toys. Finally, I refill the tub with clean water and bubbles, pick up the tot, clean him off with a sponge, look him in the eyes and tell him in what was a strangely matter-of-fact tone, "Do not shit in the bathtub again, ok?"

He looked at me and said in his addorable voice and way, "Ok." and went back to playing.

A nice reminder why kids are designed to be cute: so we wont kill them when they do stupid shit...

Anywho, my bathroom is piney/orangey fresh, and the kid is clean. Now, maybe... I can get to work.

Assuming he doesn't shit all over the bedroom....

*runs in there to check, just to be sure*

Current Mood: 8)
 
Recovery
11.28.04 (12:34 pm)   [edit]
Well, what a fun weekend this has been....

Thursday consided of a trip to McDonalds, which I have already mentioned. Friday was a fairly ok day. I had to work, so I had to pester friends into watching the kid since the daycare was closed. After work, the tot and I relaxed at home. I visited my parents house earlier in the day and dug out two of my favorite books from my teen years...the biography of Winston Churchhill and Alas, Babalyon.

So I broke into reading Alas, Babalyon. If you haven't read it, its a book from the 60's that discusses a post nuclear war world. After reading it for awhile on the bed while the tot played GTA:VC, I got up to decorate the tree. I got about halfway thru, when I suddenly felt the need to lay down. So I went down on the couch.... hard.

The next few hours were a blur. My head was spinning and aching. Coming in and out of consciousness, I realized that the tot had taken pitty on me and had cuddled up next to me on the couch and was asleep. It was so sweet.

I woke up about 7:30ish with the tot still curled up next to me. I felt really cold. It wasn't the cold you feel when you get sick either... it was real cold. So I get up and check... sure enough, my furnace had decided to stop working. So... time to call the slumlord.

Now, I don't like calling the slumlord. My building has been sold off to some upper middle class dude who lives in a very expensive house in a ritzy neighborhood about 40 minutes away. Needless to say, he doesn't like to come in to town to do work on the apartments. After running thru a list of issues on the phone, where at one point he complained because I didn't know how to light my own pilot light, he came over.

Well, I didn't know how to light the pilot light because it is an electronic ignition furnace. So he looked and prodded at it for fifteen minutes. He told me that the heating repair people dont work this late. When I mentioned the one that did (see, us poor white trash, we be smarter than you think), he hemmed and hawed and finally admitted that they did, but he wasn't going to pay for them to come out. He offered to bring me some portable heaters instead. It would only be another 80 minutes or so to get them....

While he was mentioning this, I looked at the power supply of the now coverless furnace. I traced it, and I found a box with a button on it. Curious, I reached over his shoulder and pushed the button. BAM... the furnace came back to life. I think the guy was shocked that I figured out the problem and he didn't. After all, he is the smart landlord and I am just the poor pissant... er... tenent.

So he left, and the apartment warmed up. And I felt like shit.... So I went to bed. Slept like crap until about midnight. Kept having odd dreams about the damn book I was reading. Damn... no more nuclear holocaust books before I get sick... But anyway, around midnight I finally got the strength to get up and take some medicine. Took it, and after ten minutes I was out like a light.

Saturday I felt a bit better, but I still doped up for work. Went thru the day almost falling asleep several times. Once a supervisor almost caught me napping, lol.

Got home... and then my wisdom teeth started hurting. So after a quick blog entry... off to bed early again. Woot!

Today I am feeling better. I am doing a group project for a class... yes, I am doing the whole project myself. I find that 18-20 year old undergrads are really worthless when it comes to these things, and from my time in grad school, I am used to carrying undergraduate students. Sure, it may be unfair to let them get an A because of me... but I would rather that than get a D because of them. When I take breaks from the project, I finish decorating the tree (the official lighting will take place in a half hour, btw), cleaning, and bonding with the tot.

Now... I think I will take a short nap. I have slept more the past few days than I have in months, and I still feel tired.

Current Mood: :arrow:
 
Tooth ache
11.27.04 (5:24 pm)   [edit]
My wisdom teeth are really really really really bothering me. All four of them are impacted, and they are putting alot of pressure on my other teeth. And every now and then... like right now... it really really hurts.

I have been pestering the oral surgeon for a bump up... but alas, he is still booked up.

Ironicly, I could have gotten this done faster in Canada. Yah... our system works ALOT better. *cough*

I need to take asprin and lay down. More to come later.... Man, wisdom teeth suck ass.

Current Mood: :cry:
 
A good McGiving
11.25.04 (4:01 pm)   [edit]
Well, normally I hit Burger King for Thanksgiving, but this year the guy who owns all of the ones in town decided to give the kids a day off. Thus, I ended up driving all over town looking for an open restaurant. Had to settle on a McDonalds. There are about three people who own the McDonalds restaurants here, and unfortunatly the only one open today was owned by the jackass who feels the need to put nativity scenes outside of all his restaurants. I normally don't eat at his stores because of that... but beggers can't be choosers. lol!

Anyway, it was double cheeseburgers and fries for dinner at the gnome home. So from now on, this day shall be called McGiving.

Before that wonderful quest for food, the little one and I spend alot of time bonding, a bit of cleaning, and alot of time putting up Xmas decorations. I am about halfway done with the tree as I speak.

It was great this year to pull out all the decorations because with the ex gone, I could finally throw out all the shit I hate... and all the shit her cats pissed on. I was able to get four boxes of stuff down to barely over two.

Right now, I am still trying to decide if I want to shop before I go to work tomorrow. Normally I don't shop the Friday after McGiving... but there is an entertainment center that has my eye, and the one I have now is more unstable than I would like to have with a tot in the house.

Back to the tree...

Current Mood: 8)
 
The closest thing to action I have gotten....
11.23.04 (4:05 pm)   [edit]
From the Hot Blogs list:


Check it out! Finally the gnome is seeing some action with the ladies. In this picture, I am on top of Goo Girl! What a rare treat!

Its the closest I have come to any action with a woman in... like... months.

Get it... I am... on top... of... a girl... Goo Girl... on top... ha.. ha.. eh.....

Yah, I get more action off the ever crashing Tblog than in real life... and the action I get here is just the luck of the draw... and worse yet, its not even real action......

Holy hell, I need to get laid.

*goes off to sob softly*

Current Mood: :oops:
 
Pain
11.23.04 (9:26 am)   [edit]
Damn, my wisdom teeth hurt. Like... really really hurt.

I have four impacted wisdom teeth. The ones on the bottom are really pushing on the teeth in front of them. I just had one on top start to break thru the gumline. I am on a constant diet of pain killers to keep the pain at bay.

My first appointment at the oral surgeon in December cannot come fast enough.... ouchies...

In other "news", I have my assessment portfolio done for my teaching class. It basicly involves making assignments, handing them out, getting them back, grading them, justifying your grading, then putting the grades in a grade book. You know, the nuts and bolts of teaching. Party on.

But with that done, I only have one more major project due in any class, and its due next monday... then its cruise control the rest of the way out.

Current Mood: :oops:
 
Pappa's got a brand new set of lines!
11.21.04 (9:54 am)   [edit]
Dating has not been very successful for me since my divorce. I have had very little luck. I will admit, I am rusty. And since I am still fairly new to this single thing, I am still trying to perfect my pick up lines.

I mean, you can't just expect the women to fall for you for your looks unless you are Brad Pit... and if you are poor like me, you can't expect them to fall for you car. Thus, you have to have some smooth ass pick up lines. Furthermore, with all the talk that women give us about how they want a man who can love them all night long, I have figured out that you have to let the women know that you are a lover, and that you know how to please them in bed... otherwise, the ladies won't even bother with you.

So I go up to a hot chick in the bar last night and told her that I would treat her pussy like a fine sports car: I would get inside her, take off my shoes, rip a big fart, and then drive her as hard and fast as I can until I get home.

Needless to say, that line didn't work. So I decided to try a different approach. I went up to another sexy chica and told her that I would let her treat my cock like a pop tart: She could shove it in her, and as long as she didn't burn it she could suck the frosting off of it later.

Well, after I picked myself up off the floor (she had a mean left hook), I decided to go back to my origional style. I left that bar and went into a downtown club called "St. Agnes Cathedral". There was only one chick in there... and she was on her knees. Oh yah, I thought, this could be my lucky night! I went up to the chick, who was wearing a super fly habit on her head and whispered in her ear that I would make love to her like she was having a pap smear: I would lay her down, spread her legs, stick in the probe, and it would be so good that in the end she would pay me.

I learned three things from that experience. One, nuns aren't interested in sex. Two, holy water thrown into your eyes really burns. Three, downtown nuns go to church strapped with knives.

I was lucky to escape that church with only a couple of minor scratches and stab wounds. The bleeding looked kinda bad, so I thought I could use this injury to my advantage to hit on an EMT hunny. So I call an ambulance. When the ambulance showed up with the sexy nurse driving it, I thought I would bust out my flyest new line of the night. I would even make it relevant to her field.... you know, show I was down with her career and stuff.

As she wheeled me into the back of the ambulance, I told her that if we got it on, our date would be like childbirth: I would numb her up (most likely with cheep liquor), there would be hours of pushing in a nice soft bed, and at the end of it all she would be callin me daddy!

I dont remember much after that. She opened the door and pushed me out of the speeding ambulance. When I came to, I was laying in the gutter... alone.

Dating is going to be harder than I thought....

Current Mood: :?
 
Pickles
11.19.04 (3:54 pm)   [edit]
I don't know why, but I am going thru a huge pickle fad right now. I had a burger today for lunch, and I had lots of pickles on it. I stopped at the store, and bought a jar of pickles to snack on. I have had about 12 already tonight.

If I didn't have a penis, I would think I was pregnant or something.

In other news, which really isn't important enough to be called news, I bought a lottery ticket today. Here's hoping. Also, put gas in the car, went to the doctor and found out the tot's foot is just fine. Then I ate spagetti for dinner... along with several pickles.

Except for the pickles thing, life was pretty mundane today. lol!

Current Mood: 8)
 
Pay up!
11.18.04 (9:31 am)   [edit]
If you bet against me in my last blog, you owe me a dollar and a donut. Sure as shit, there was a letter from DFS on my door, and several phone calls from an agent wanting to see my kid immediately.

Soooooo, I cleaned the kid up really nice yesterday morning, got all purdied up myself, and took him into the office. I sat down with the guy and explained where my tot's "mysterious and inconsistant injury" (according to the letter) came from. I was able to talk the guy out of doing the monthly inspections, thankfully, and they seem to have dismissed the issue.

After the meeting, I took the kid for a walk thru downtown towards the train tracks. A train wizzes by, and the tot gets excited. So I scoop the kid up and run to the car, and off we go chasing the train. We caught up with it, and we sat next to the train yard for an hour watching the train get hooked up with new boxcars and finally depart. After that time, I took the kid home and started priming the walls of his room for repainting (the reasons for that is another blog all its own), fixed him some grilled cheese, and took time out now and then to help him steal a car in GTAVC and to tickle/wrestle on the bed in my room. Finally, I bathe him, give him juice, and tuck him in with a nice train lullibye.

That, my friends, is just a typical day in the life of a child abuser... *cough*

Current Mood: :roll:
 
Cleaning spree, for I know whats coming
11.16.04 (11:28 am)   [edit]
I went on a huge cleaning spree last night.

Why? Because my kid pulled a muscle on Saturday night.

How do those two things connect to each other, you ask? Obviously, you have never been poor. Let me explain:

My kid slid off the couch on Saturday night. Afterwards, he laid there crying for a bit. I comforted him for it, of course, thinking he had just bruised his booty. Well, when he got up, he had a bad limp. You know, the kind you get when you have a charlie horse or something.
Now, if you are middle or upper class, this would be a non issue. You would simply let the kid walk it off, and send them to school on monday with a slight limp, no questions asked. But its not the same for the lower class... or in the eyes of society, the child abuse class.

I did the parental joint move test, and did some poking, and there was no reaction. On Sunday his limp improved, but not enough for it to be gone on Monday and daycare. So this means that I have to take him to the doctor... an emergency clinic to be precise... otherwise the daycare will start accusing me of abuse on Monday for NOT taking him to the doctor.
I have seen this before at my daycare... and perhaps its just my daycare... but if a set of parents pulls up in a Lexus, the kid can have a bone protruding out of his arm and the parents can say "Oh, its just a scratch," and the daycare will leave them alone. A kid can have a small scratch on their leg and if their parents drive a ghetto sled, then the daycare provider gives them the fifth degree and asks them to take the kid to the doctor... and berates them for not taking the kid sooner. One time, I even heard them asking the parent "what are you hiding" by not taking their kid to the doctor for a cough.
Anywho, I took the kid to the doctor. The doctor did an exam, but the tot didn't react to the typical joint manipulation. Then the doctor started saying that "it did not make sence," and started eyeing me. Then she started asking me what happened. I explained it again... and again... then again. She told me ok, but in the 'I don't believe you' sort of way.

Ohhhh great.

At any rate, they gave me their eval (which I had to have in case the daycare got mouthy), and I went on my way, promising to call his primary doctor the next day. Well, three things here:
1. His limp was almost gone by Monday.
2. The phone number of his primary doctor is hard as hell to find.
3. The next time his doctor can see him is in 3 weeks. If I am lucky. The person never has openings. I know this from experience.

But to humor them, I have called his primary doctor, and I have an "emergency appointment" for my kid... in 2 1/2 weeks.

At any rate, his daycare didn't seem to be overly phased by his limp. He is a rough and tumble type of tot. However, I have that wonderful DFS feeling in my bones.

DFS, you ask? Division of Family Services. Every state has one. If you hate someone who has kids, the best revenge you can get is calling your states DFS and discuss a "concern about child abuse," and that person will be in for a harrassment filled time the next couple of weeks... or if they are poor, the next few months. Because DFS loves to harass people on lower incomes... after all, middle class people never abuse their kids. *wink*

I have a feeling that either the doctors office, or one of my neighbors who got pissed because I parked in "their spot" in the parking lot will be calling DFS. If my suspicions hold true and I have that letter hanging on my door (I have seen it several times), I can expect a nice grilling from some child welfare nut, along with several "suprise visits" over the next few weeks.

I feel it in me bones, kiddies. Either the doctor who was not satisfied with my story and is a "madatory reporter" of child abuse... whenever they feel like it, or my pissy neighbor. Dollars to dounuts there will be a letter on my door when I get home.

Not because I abuse my kid. I would never EVER do that. But all because of a limp... a 1/2 foot fall off the couch.... combine that with being in a low income bracket, and you get the state breathing down your neck.

Home is where the heart is... and when DFS is involved, it better be able to pass a white glove inspection. I am not kidding either. I had a friend who's family had DFS on them off and on over the years. The agent would litterally put on a white glove and inspect the house. Oh, sure, they don't hold their own nice middle class houses to that standard... but remember, the middle and upper class are BETTER than you if you are lower class.

Heck, who isn't better than you? That could be a dozen blog entries right there, everything from shopping with food stamps to working in retail to driving a crappy car and being pulled over for being "suspicious"... oh, from what I have seen and what I have experienced, the stories I could tell....

Gotta get to class tho....

Current Mood: :!:
 
Sunday drivers
11.14.04 (10:49 am)   [edit]
While I was at work yesterday, I got ahold of a map of the area. I am a map junkie, so I actually like reading maps. Yah, weird I know. Well, while looking at the map, I found a road that I have never been down before. I thought to myself "I want to see where that road goes!"

Thus I decided it was time for another Sunday Drive.

A Sunday drive is something I started with the tot a long time ago. He and I would get into the car and just drive. Sometimes there would be a destination "area", other times I would have a spot on the map I wanted to go. Still others, we just drive wherever the mood struck. In any case, I like the adventure.

I have not done a drive like that in a few months because I have been so drained due to the requirements of work and school. But I got lots of sleep and a somewhat full tank of gas, so off we went.

Some observations:

* I saw a church sign that said "The disenchantment of 54 million is the will of God." Yah... let the healing begin.

* I found the road I was looking for. It followed some remote railroad tracks in the countryside. This is what we called a good "fuckin' road" back in high school. It got me to thinking about how long it has been since I have gotten some good quality time with a young lady on a dark country road. That kind of sex can be some of the most passionate because you always run to risk of getting caught.

* Continuing down the road, we drove thru farm country. At one point, I stopped and got the tot out to look at some cows. I took some time to take in the surroundings. The rolling hills, the wide open fields, the old barns, the trees, the cows... The silence... it was beautiful. I can see why people on occassion in the past would buy a bit of land out here and build a house.
The sad thing about it, tho, is that this area is between two growing cities. Soon, hundreds of middle and upper class people will stand on this road and see what I see, and they will want to own it for themselves... and they will build dozens of cookie cutter subdivisions. In the process, destroying all the stuff that brought them out to develope the area in the first place.

* As I drove back into the city, I noticed that our Putt Putt place has been sold, and coming in a few months is a used car lot. Woopie. Just what this town needed.
I will admit, Putt Putt sucked. It was overpriced and oversterilized mini golf. No windmills, no real hazards. It blew.
Curiousity drove me to check out the only other mini golf place in town. It is small, tucked on a sideroad. On this Sunday morning, there were a few people there, mainly using the batting cages. It was a quiet scene. But a happy one.

* At one point, the tot started going "Spongebob" over and over. I thought perhaps he had shot his bolt, but then I looked at the Burger King on the corner. Right there on the roof, looking like a giant yellow sniper, was a giant inflated Spongebob. I was not sure if I should be happy or scared. I saw the thing twitch in the wind, and I sped off. I bet the fucker had a gun....

* While driving thru the city checking out the leaves, we hit the church crowd getting out. We passed several people trying to get out of church parking lots. Its amazing the extent these people go to make themselves all holy.... so many suits and ties, nice dresses etc etc. Outside a couple of the churches I saw people in casual clothes and people all dressed up. Neither group seemed to intermingle.
In either case, it seems that people who are all holyfied can't drive. Apparently the Holy Spirt moves them to not yield to oncoming traffic. Saw a couple of near misses, and I was almost t-boned too. Hallalueah.

I love Sunday drives. I should do it more often. I should do it a little earlier apparently, so I can avoid the dangers of the Sunday drivers.

Current Mood: 8)
 
Oh yes, winter is coming...
11.12.04 (7:46 pm)   [edit]
Ahh, we have a forcast for a below freezing tempature tonight. Just another reminder that winter is coming.

I love winter. I like the cold. I love snow and ice. I love wearing hoodies and capes. I love the way that it gets really quiet in the winter... especually if you are out in nature. The silence is soothing.

However, my car hates winter. Whever it gets cold, I am forced to park the car in a way so that I can pull out of the parking lot forward. Why? Because on cold mornings, my car will not go into reverse... at all... until the car has been warmed for a good long time. So its either sit in a cold car for 20 minutes waiting for it to decide that its good and ready to back out, or spend 10 minutes trying to back into my parking spot in my narrow ass parking lot in the evenings.

Oh, and lets not forget that my defrost doesn't work properly because my AC doesn't work, and in newer cars, the two are connected.

And I doubt those seals around my windows are going to hold out much longer. I expect the whistling winds of winter to blow thru my hair as I drive to work anyday now....

But in a twist of fate, apparently the county assessors office must know how shitty my car is, because the property tax bill dropped 12 bucks this year. The largest drop ever. Maybe he saw me drive past the court house in the ol' ghetto sled.... lol!

Bedtime. The morning comes quickly, especually in good cold sleeping weather like we have had lately.

Current Mood: :)
 
Escape
11.10.04 (6:33 pm)   [edit]
I am a fairly well edumacated person, and I become more edumacated every day as I work towards my goal of becoming a teacher. So the worry I am about to describe doesn't happen often. But it is happening again right now. As I look at my son sleeping in the floor next to me, I worry about my ability to escape.

Escape what? Escape from this town. Escape from this area. Escape from this state.

I moved out of my hometown for about five years. In those five years, I lived in a large metro area. It was a world away from where I grew up. It had people from all over the world living there. It had a very lively and diverse mass media market. Heck, it had major league sports. It had an evening news that was actually filled, for the most part, with news... not feel good stories about Xmas doggy sweaters like the one that was on our ABC affiliate tonight.

No... I am not kidding either.

The area I lived in seemed to be more open and free... at least on my side of the state line. Yah, we bordered with Kansas, and things got really fucked up on their side of the line from time to time (like when their school board took evolution completely out of the state education curriculum for a year)...but for the most part, people seemed to be freer in that metro area. When a school district from my home area voted to ban dancing during school sponsored events (thanks to the pressure of a local preacher), the media and most people in the metro just shook their heads at the patheticness of it.

I was really happy up there. But sometimes things don't go so well, and one thing lead to another (a story I am really not comfortable sharing yet) and I ended up back in my hometown. Over the months I have been back, I have been able to analyze things... and realize that this town... this area... isn't where I want to be.

But my analyzing has gone further than that. I live in the state that brought you Ashcroft and Limbaugh... 'my apologies' or 'you’re welcome', depending on your persuasion. I live in a state where the people in one of the small towns nearby attempted to vote for a tax increase, their first in over a decade, solely to fund a legal fight to keep the Ten Commandments posted in their school cafeteria. Yes... they would not vote for a tax increase to remodel their school after it was condemned by the county as being a health hazard... but they were willing to fund a fight to promote their religion... all the while harassing the person who was brave enough to point out the inherent unfairness of the display to the point that she had to hire a private security firm to guard her house and escort her relative's children to school when the county sheriff department refused to help them. I live in a state where a lawmaker blocked a law that would help fund programs to help Spanish speaking migrant farmer’s transition into a more stable lifestyle and learn English because it would encourage lots more of "those people" to come to our state. And speaking of the "those people" mentality, my state just elected a governor who made a campaign pledge to change Medicaid so that in order to be eligible, you must have a child and your income must be no higher than 50% of the poverty line so "certain people" will no longer get a "free ride through life." Golly gee wilikers, I wasn't aware that being poor, not really being able to get ahead, and living paycheck to paycheck, not knowing if you will have a roof over your head next month was a "free ride"....
Or my favorite as of late....I live in an area/state where there is a petition drive (don’t know how big or small it is, but the fact it exists is enough) to ban the network that shows "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" from the cable providers because it "promotes a deviant lifestyle and should not be shown on broadcast television." When the person asking for my signature told me that, and I tried to explain the difference between broadcast tv and cable television, and the importance of freedom of expression, I could almost see them in their mind sticking their fingers in their ears and going 'lalalalala'....

Whoa, that was one big run-on cluster of a sorta paragraph, but you get the point.

As the symbols of intolerance start popping up more and more around here...the things I mentioned above…plus the weekly graffiti on the only mosque in a 150 mile radius (which is closed now, btw due to the intolerance...but people still keep vandalizing the building), nativity scenes and religious displays in businesses, anti-gay/anti-abortion/an ti-evolution-in-schools bumper stickers, and of course the bright red the state glowed on Nov 2nd…. I realize more and more that this is not the place for me. And this is not the environment I want my son to grow up in.

I mean, I was able to grow thru it mostly unharmed. But I worry about him… especially if we stayed around here. With all the ignorance around here… with the power that organized religion holds… would he be able to be himself? I fear that that he would face much of the crap I went thru…. Or actually, he would probably get it worse, since my parents raised me in a more mainstream type of household than what I run for myself today. Rebelling against a straight laced background is expected. Living in a non straight laced household runs against the grain. As my kid is sleeping, I look at him sometimes and think, “Sorry kiddo, a nice two parent, church going, don’t rock the boat family is not what you were born into.”

But yah, to make a looooooooooooong story short, I long to move out of this area, and give my child a better environment to grow up in. I even have a short list of areas to move to. I just have worries about being able to find a job/housing/money to make the big move when the time comes in (hopefully) a few months. The last time I tried to move cross country, the job disappeared like a fart in the wind, and I was left scrambling to survive. Yes, the circumstances are different, but the longing to escape makes the worries I have linger now and then.

Here is to hoping for a brighter future.

Right now, its time for bed. My immediate future tomorrow holds another bullshit set of assignments due. I can’t wait to get out of school.

Although knowing my penchant for self torture, I may go against my own common sense and go after a ph.d. in a couple of years after all…. after I have forgotten how much school SUCKS.…

oye.

Current Mood :idea:
 
whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine
11.09.04 (6:26 pm)   [edit]
The whiiiiiiiney cry.

I can't fucking stand it.

I have a kid who will dance on my stomach after I just ate, destroy limited edition textbooks, insist on eating nothing but bread for every meal everyday for a week, will stand there and count to 20 over and over and over and over and over... all of that doesn't really phase me.

But when he gets sick, and he does that cry, that looong cry that is really nothing more than a drawn out whine... parents know what I am talking about.... it makes some little nerve in the [i]annoyance parentus maximous[/i] part of my brain twitch.

My tot came down with another head cold today. Most likely from making out with the water fountain at the daycare. See, they have only one water fountain, and it is so hard to get water out of, the kids basicly have to french the thing everytime they get a drink. And that means a germ bonanza. I filed a formal complaint about it with the daycare director, although I doubt they do anything....

But yah, the tot is sick, and he pops off that whiney cry every few minutes. He can play his toy piano for hours and I can ignore it... but that whine stops any and all progressive thought in my head dead in its tracks. As proof, I have two fairly interesting blog entries saved in Word now, because everytime I would get on a roll, he would start the whine, kinda like a tornado siren that spins around and around. Start and stop... start and stop. Finally, he derailed my train of thought completely, and I started researching cat farts on yahoo instead to pass the time.

Ironicly, he has not whined this entire time.

Hopefully he will be better and less whiney tomorrow so I can actually finish my trains of thought.

Actually, I just want him to feel better tomorrow. I hate to see him sick.

Oh wait, there is the whine now. Hopefully a Capri Sun will keep the whine at bay for a few hours while I sleep.

In theory, anyway....

Current Mood: :oops:
 
Working to bring you more
11.09.04 (9:01 am)   [edit]
In order to live up to my promise from last night to live up to my new motto of:


I cleaned out my fridge this morning and threw out a package of two month old hot dogs. In fact, I walked the old hot dogs out to the dumpster in the parking lot. Less sausage for me!

Then I hopped in my car and ran over a stray cat on the way to school.



Naw, I am just playin.... I didn't run over the stray cat... it actually commited suicide under my tires. And for all I know, it probably wasn't a stray.

Besides, when I hit it, it cussed at me in Spanish, so for all I know it wasn't a cat either. I don't really know, the sun was in my eyes.

LOL

*sigh* So I try to get more pussy in this blog, and fail again. Ah well... Perhaps its time to come up with a new motto.....


Anywho, time to actually do something in my computer class. Today, we get to insert graphics AND text into the same document. Oh, the ways they challange us....

Current Mood: :shock:
 
This blog needs
11.08.04 (6:11 pm)   [edit]
I have been scanning over my blogs as of late, and I think I have gotten into a rut. I mean, all I seem to do is rant about school, talk about myself, and talk about my kid.

Yah, those are the things that my life seems to be about as of late... but what good does that do the poor unfortunate souls who stumble across this blog? I know what you are thinking: Where is the excitement? Where is the constant political bickering? Oh....and most importantly, where is the titalation?




I have come to the following conclusion:


Unless you disagree....

Current Mood: 8)
 
Curse you grilled cheese!
11.07.04 (10:23 am)   [edit]
So I ask the tot what he wants for lunch, and he replies with "Grilled cheeese."

Fuck damn it.

I hate making grilled cheese. It is one of the two warm foods I make in this house that doesn't involve the microwave.

See, I gave up on real Mac n Cheese months ago, because I could never get it to taste right....so now we are an Eazy Mac house. I have tried to bake a pie with... so/so results. Steak or chicken? Fugetabootit.

So there really are two foods I cook anymore without the microwave. One is double decker tacos. Well, to be fair, I only use the stove on those for the refried beans. I found a place that sells taco meat precooked so I can thankfully microwave that. The other food I cook cook is... grilled cheese.

Now, I know they make microwavable premade sandwitches... but they are hard to find and expensive as hell. So I am stuck with the long, painful process of cooking grilled cheese by hand.

Ok you... you there in the back, quit snickering! Grilled cheese is hard to make, damn it! First you have to gather all the crap.... butter, cheese, bread, a knife. THEN you have to butter all the bread. Have to be careful not to overbutter spots, or it won't cook right. Then you have to unwrap each piece of cheese... which is wrapped with the same stuff that overclingy girlfriends are made of.

Then comes the real pain. You have to throw the bread on the stove in a pan, and the cheese on the bread. Thus... the dance begins. You have to stay right fucking there and hover over it. In the process of cooking, this shit apparently has a 4 second window in which the bread will be perfectly cooked. Before that, its a buttery mess. After that 4 second window the bread instantly burns to a black hunk of its former self.

In other words... there is no fucking margin for error. You cannot leave the room. Get a bad case of the runs? Shit your pants or face a burned lunch. Gotta pee? Better be ready to mop your floor if you want an edible sandwitch. Your house bursts into flames? You have to keep your eyes on the prize and your spatchula in your hand...

At any rate, I managed not to fubar lunch today, despite my injured hand. I slammed my finger in the car door last night... a wonderful event that capped off a crappy day at work.... but thats another post for another time.

Right now, my tot had a bottle of egg nog in his hand, and I need to try to get it away from him. He is turning into an egg nog addict, and its not even thanksgiving yet.....

BTW, Star Wars nuts: Here is a link to help you pass the time.
http://www.astercity.net/" title="http://www.astercity.net/" target="_blank"http://www.astercity.net/~jerry/full.mov
Current Mood: :P
 
Its all about control
11.05.04 (5:27 pm)   [edit]
Well, had my second of two shots of teaching in my practicum today. The lesson went fairly well. The only minor problem I had was with minor bits of class control. I knew it, the guy who evaluated me knew it. I knew he would nitpick on it.... so I went on the offensive.

What I told him is what I am telling you now. You cannot expect a person who shows up twice a week for a practicum to have complete control over the class the two times they teach it. A practicum student is in the same boat as a substitute... seen as higher than a student, but lower than a regular teacher.

Of course, like most in the ivory tower the dude who evaluated me started with some philosophical mumbo jumbo... to which I responded that in addition to my points above, you cannot expect 100% of teenagers in a classroom to focus 100% of the time. I pointed out the worst thing that happened was occassional group whispering while I was talking....after they were gathered into groups for group work.... and a couple of heads down on desks now and then.

Students sleeping in class. What a new and revolutionary concept.

Then my supervising practicum teacher lays into the dude, complaining about how it was unrealisitic to have someone come into a class and teach twice like I was expected to... and it was damn inconvient for her as well. So that was rewarding.

But really, the class went well except for the occassional mumblefests. In fact, I was praised for the innovation and content of my lesson. It was A material.

But still, I was not happy. There was a section of crap I taught because it was trivial definition crap that I knew the teacher liked... and in the end, she gives me part of my grade. If I felt I had full freedom, I would have skipped the shit, and I feel I would have had a better lesson. I also brought in some shit to pass around the classroom... again, I would not have done this either, except for the fact that my evaluator has a raging hard-on for tactile learning.

Oh, how I long for control... thats what its all about in the classroom... control. With control comes power and presence, and with power and presence comes the ability to help students get the most out of what they learn.

Tomorrow brings a full day of work. I am kinda saddened that one of my cool friends there quit today because she wanted more money. Meanwhile, the other two people I get along with... ironicly both banging members of management, are also looking to quit. They are just tired of all the shit that we put up with.

Oye... I need a stiff drink of Aquafina. On the rocks.

Current Mood: :?
 
Damn it, dam!
11.04.04 (3:10 pm)   [edit]
A couple weeks back, I had to write a one page paper on some science article. In traditional gnome fashion, I waited until the last minute to type the paper up. The paper was over an article that researched the breeding habits of some fish below a resevoir in North Carolina. Really riviting stuff, let me tell yah.

Actually, I am glad I went to grad school. I mean, the study actually made sence to me.

I am not sure if I should be happy or sad about that... but anyway...

So I write the paper about the study of fish below the resevior. And what holds water in a resevoir? Thats right, a dam.

Well, in my typical write it ten minutes before its due, don't worry about proofing it fashion, I wrote about the research study. I spell checked it, and it was crystal clear. And I turn it in.

Only to get it back today with red ink all over it. Red circles, actually. It seems that I kinda sorta used the word "damn" everytime I ment to say "dam." The best line:
"The (enter long scientific term), or the "Damn Fish" as the locals call them due to their constant presence in the release zone..."

So yah, I was nine for nine with that little typo all throughout the paper. I went to appologize to the teacher, and she laughed it off, telling me that she knew it was just a mistake, and not an excuse to cuss at her.

Ironicly, I got one of the higher grades in the class...

Other than that, I skipped three of my classes because my kid's daycare said he was pale and sluggish, and I can NOT miss tomorrow. So I went to pick him up... and got drafted as a helper on a walk around the neighborhood. It was really enjoyable.

It also reminded me why I would NOT want to teach a kindergarden. Man, some of those kids were little dickheads. There was this one kid who held the hand of some kid that was about 6 inches and 10 pounds lighter, and would fling the little one around like a ragdoll. Then there were the fart jokes...

Oh precious.... precious children.....

Tot seemed fine later, so I took him back to preschool, went to my night class, which got out early because the teacher has a sore throat... and now I am enjoying some "me" time.

I deserve some me time, dam it.

Current Mood: :o
 
Holy CRAP!
11.03.04 (3:19 pm)   [edit]
I was looking at the "hot blogs" section kinda aimlessly... since surfing the web beats working on my projects.... and I saw that my blog was in the top 50!

Holy Shit!


Must be a slow ass day on Tblog. LOL!

Current Mood: :shock:
 
Day of the Dead
11.03.04 (2:55 pm)   [edit]
Its the last day of the Halloween holiday season.

Holiday season, you ask?

It all starts with a pagan holiday that coinsides with the full moon in October that is closest to the end of the month. Then the Christian way to try to market itself to pagans in the early days of the church... Halloween.

The final day of the season is the Day of the Dead. Its a holiday in Mexico where they honor the memories of those who have gone before them in a very festive way. It is really a great holiday. Look it up on Yahoo if you want to know more.

Anyway, my DOTD was fairly uneventful. Spent time working on a couple of projects, played cars with the tot....

The closest thing to annoying that happened to day was trying to reset the pin on my debit card. I was told by one bank branch that they didn't do it...its the northside branch, I guess they assume poor people don't need new pin numbers or something. So they sent me to another branch. After getting there and whipping out my card, they told me that they only reset ATM cards, that that I would have to go to a third branch to reset the pin on my debit card. By this time, it was raining fairly bad, and seeing a bad auto accident made me pause and decide to head home.

I did swing by AAA and got some maps. I love maps. I don't know why, I just do. So I got maps for states I am thinking of moving to next year. If the election did anything for me, it helped me cut a couple states off my list. Now I am down to five. After all, you can really tell alot about an area by who they vote for and the laws they approve.

One state crossed off my list really sticks out in my mind. I won't give names, but needless to say they crossed themselves off my list in a big way. I am sorry, but any state that will elect a person to the Senate who said "Lesbianism is so widespread in our schools that we may have to only allow one girl to go to the bathroom at a time," is NOT worth moving to. If senators represent the kind of people they represent, then that state is full of fucking bigoted dipshits.

Here's to hoping the economy stops struggling and/or doesn't go into recession again in the nation as a whole, so I can actually find a job in my field next year. I know the economy is still crap in this state. Last hiring season, there was 1... count it.... 1 Social Studies teaching job within 100 miles of here. And with a law passing to divert money from the general fund to road construction... and knowing the opinions of the person that got elected for Governor.... things look even grimmer for the kids... and the teachers, of this state.

I feel so much like a rat trying to escape a sinking ship.

Oh well, here's to hopeing that this time next year, I will have moved. I am looking forward to changes in attitudes and lattitudes... or at the least if I am stuck in this state for another year, I will make it to one of the more open minded parts....

Enough blabbing tho. I have the pumkin and the halloween tree lit. Time to do some spoooooooooky tickling with the tot.

Current Mood: :)
 
Election macking
11.02.04 (2:12 pm)   [edit]
Well, I tried to use Election Day to try to improve my dating life. I went up to several hotties today and offered to "stuff their balot box." However, that line didn't work for me, tho.

Then there was the time I walked into a computer lab, and a girl with a nice rack had an "I Voted" sticker on her left breast. I go up to her and say "I hope you let the other one vote."

She was like "What?"

And then I pointed at her chest and said "Hey, I will admit, I like both of your candidates there!"

She then kicked me in the balls, and stood over me yelling about how I was a pig. I looked up her skirt.... no bush to be seen. She chose wisely....


LOL!

Ok, so the whole post is a lie.... except for the chick with nice boobies having an sticker on one of them. That, sadly, was the highlight of my day. It was even better than voting.

Holy hell, I need to get laid....

Current Mood: :!:
 
The only real choice for President
11.02.04 (8:34 am)   [edit]
In the end, you have to follow your heart when you vote. Don't pick the lesser of two evils... instead, vote cute!



The World's Cutest Candidate™ is counting on your vote, America!

If you want to know how cute this candidate is, check out his link to the left with the "He will get my vote in November" heading.

Oh hell, its too late to research! Just do it! Vote Cute in 04!

Current Mood: 8)
 
Will it never end?
11.02.04 (2:22 am)   [edit]
Man, I was up at 5:15 this morning to finish a backup plan for a group project due today. I have a feeling my group member won't come through, so I did the project myself just in case. Will this group work crap never end?

On top of that, I have two pieces of... just... shit... due in my Journalism class today. The guy can't teach his way out of a wet paper bag, and his idea of teaching is to give us handouts on new material and then have us do it as homework with little or no guidance. Plus he is half deaf to boot. Oye.

Then I get to turn in a jolly lesson play for my teaching class on Thursday, and actually teach a class on Friday. And while teaching is fun, just walking into the middle of another teachers class and teaching one lesson really is not that great. The students have expectations and are used to how THAT teacher does things. I really hate competing with crap like that.

So yah, this week is pretty much another damn fustrating busy work filled waste of my time. I am really sucking fick of school this semester.

And speaking of wastes of time, its time to go vote!

Both candidates gave up on my state months ago. I am hoping that they are both wrong, and it will be closer than they think. Luckily, we have two really large metro areas that sometimes cancel out the idiot votes from the rural part of the state. Plus.... it just feels so razor thin close....

Current Mood: :?
 
I AM 75% EVIL GENIUS!
90% EVIL GENIUS


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